Oh there’s plenty of Christian nationalist men thinking about “divine dick”
Does that mean God has a neodick?
…i like the way you think
I wouldn’t call them neopronouns, they’re more like archeopronouns.
This is excellent:
If God has no cock, then being male doesn’t need a cock to be real.
If he has a cock, then does he only use it to pee? Or does he use it to both pee and fuck? Does that mean he had sexual relations with a minor who was also married already?
Does the Trinity have a cock? Or is it only the father or is it only the son? You can clearly see that the son had a cock. But did he keep it as a ghost cock? Do they have 3 different cocks? Or do they share a cock?
Since they supposedly are virgin, do they have to jack off? Do they jack off at the same time? Or does one have to hide somewhere to jack off? Or are they okay just jacking off in front of the others?
What do they pee? If you take a shower in god pee, do you smell good? Or bad?
And why all these questions about pee anyway…how about poo? Is God poo good or bad? If it’s bad, doesn’t that mean that God has bad things inside of him? Does that mean they gotta eat something? What do they eat? Can we eat it too? How come God let’s people die of hunger if he has a source of God food?
Pretty sure the official position in most sects, including Catholicism, is that God is not “male”, but singular male pronouns are nevertheless the only “correct” pronouns for “Him”.
Technically, you can’t say that He/Him are God’s preferred pronouns because the capitalization doesn’t appear in the oldest texts. They are more a matter of tradition than of reality. However, you could say that’s even worse because Christians have embraced these neopronouns on God’s behalf.
What if He came out as trans in the 19th century and influenced the scholars to change His pronouns through dreams?
I can’t really call something that’s literally as old as writing a “neo-” anything. Non-standard, perhaps?
There’s some interesting conversation about this topic though.
https://ell.stackexchange.com/questions/83130/does-the-word-god-get-the-pronoun-it-or-he
The weird thing is that a lot of christians (including the Catholic church) affirm that God “the Father” has actually no gender.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gender_of_God_in_Christianity
Does Jesus have a gender tho? As stated above, Jesus has a fully human body and nature (or else you are deemed a heretic by the council of Chalcedon). He is described as a man and several churches and rulers have historically claimed to hold a piece of his foreskin, so he must’ve had a penis. Therefore:
- Either Jesus was agender despite having a penis, therefore penis doesn’t imply male gender or
- Jesus was male. So either:
- Jesus and God don’t have the same gender, so they aren’t the same entity, which the councils of Nicea and Chalcedon would deem a heresy, or
- God can manifest as male or agender, making Them genderfluid.
Rulers have what now?
It’s also been mentioned in other parts of this thread, but the holy foreskin has been considered an important relic, and there are accounts of many kings like Charlemagne having owned it.
I know people like to call the holy trinity absurd because of the multiple entities being 1 entity, but I would like to direct your attention to plural people. Holy-trinity-like situations actually occur in real people. Even with different genders.
Jesus is not god.
Don’t know why people are down voting this. That’s canonically correct in the Jewish an Muslim traditions.
The holy trinity, the father, the son and the holy spirit are the same entity.
Then I guess this makes you an Arian heretic. /s
Jesus and The Father is not just the same entity. From what I understand it’s like water: liquid water is water. Ice is water but it’s not a same thing as (liquid) water.
The Father is just something above gender. Jesus is a man.
Considering how consistently the world gets fucked, yeah, I’d say there’s a divine Dick out there doing all the fucking.
Are earthquakes the planet having an orgasm?
I’m more inclined to call it indigestion…
Can god sling a dick so big even he can’t rub one out?
I thought that’s where the biblically accurate angels come into play?
Capitalised pronouns ARE neopronouns. I use them, and I wrote an article on My blog about it: https://medium.com/@viridiangrail/introduction-to-capitalised-pronouns-f5140e722b48
Why should every part of God need a purpose? What does efficiency mean in the face of unlimited power (palpatine.jpeg), or simplicity in the face of omniscience? Why does God have a penis? Cause he wanted one I guess. They are nice for peeing too.
Peeing implies waste, which implies imperfection. If god were really God, his body would be 100% efficient and he wouldn’t consume anything he didn’t need.
Maybe the pee is not waste, but spontaneously created to God’s will. " I want to pee, sure would be nice if I had a penis right now" - a diety that does not plan ahead, probably.
Well God, that’s pretty sexist. You don’t need a penis to pee.
One man’s waste is another man’s gold…
Nah, in its internal logic, Chalcedonean Christianity doesn’t have this problem. Jesus is defined as fully human and fully divine, and peeing is just part of being human.
Jesus and God are two different entities, we were discussing “The Father”.
Chalcedonian Christianity is also Nicene, i.e., Trinitarian: one being in three cosubstantial persons. They share the divine cock and balls, one would say.
Oh, so Jesus just had one nut, the Holy Ghost had the other one, and God obviously had the Heavenly Shaft. Got it.
Hey christofash men, if everybody is entitled to their own personal and private relationship with god, and you should love god as he loves you, it’s totally legal for your wife to think about god’s massive peener while you’re having sex strictly for the purposes of procreation. Just noodle on that for a bit.
Well the church is Christ’s bride so we can only assume it’s going to get dicked down.
I would love to see the prompt that generated this ChatGPT response.
I mean it was up in the sky about a month ago. The last time it was visible was apparently in ancient Egypt. If you missed it, to bad. The news said it wouldn’t be visible again until he gets a prostate exam in over a thousand years
The onion is back, baby!
