Hey now, I resent that. I read at a ninth grade level!

Donkey Kong sucks!

It’s in the computer!

Chosimba, you must take your place in the great circle of…. Stuff.

God I love this movie.

Wii U! Wii U! Wii U! Wii!

9/10 dentists are against flouride in water because they want you to swing by more often.

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My man cave.

Can’t afford going on trips to places.

Looking forward to: My weekend.

Dreading: monday.

It also tastes good.

Tastebuds: That’s Future Hyphlosion’s problem.

Tapatio hot sauce (or Valentinos), Crystal hot sauce, garlic powder, salt, pepper, sriracha.

All on the same pizza.

No. My job depends on results. Alcohol affects my production. Therefore, drinking on workdays is a very dumb thing for me to do.

Edit: Downvoted because alcohol gives me terrible brain fog and I want to keep my job? Alrighty then…

Next time I’ll ask her if she’s the daughter of the Nigerian prince.

Fucking Ultra Demon

This is just asking to get rickroll’d.

Well duh. Just apply for a leadership position. Double the stress for a dollar raise!

Hi, number! It’s your colleague: Another number!

Can we get to Jupiter through Earth? No, but at least there’s beaver.