You don’t think MAGA goons would organize constitutional conventions to keep their god king in office?

Or start stapling posters places.

An easy option for leaving the situation to be suffered by people that aren’t oneself.

When the fascists come for me, a gun will look like a good alternative to a death camp.

Gender inequality isn’t solved via paperwork. If anything that would make pay equity even harder to achieve.

Getcha a hard working green card husband.

And they are an energy source for the good microbes there too.

Gotta get those microbial micronutrients.

Well, physical scrubbing, sure. But also, specific fibers are required for a healthy gut microbiome to function and maintain a proper balance of microbes that produce other micronutrients that your body cannot make on its own as well as fending off the types of microbes that subsist of sugars and fats alone.

Smoothies with a proper dietary balance still have fiber. So yeah.

But even beyond that, waste products from the gut microbiome, and left over bits that the body doesn’t use. Best case scenario, you would have small, liquid poops.

Your best bet? Intravenous feeding. Not that Drag has any intention of doing this.

Black licorice is best licorice. Red licorice is just a sugar rope. Licorice is anise flavor and is an amazingly complex experience!

Fight me.

The movie Trick 'r Treat, scaring the neighborhood kids, and blowing out all the jack o lanterns at 12:01.

And leave out a bowl of milk and a tray of candies for the demons/fairies overnight.

Haha. It’s always a vibe. Saw a little kid dressed as the warden from Minecraft and I pretended to have the darkness effect and gave him a wad of mini crunch bars. I think he was super happy to get recognized!

And they aren’t hard and fast rules. Just a sliding scale. And after being on candy duty for the last 15 years, you kinda just internalize it.

Plus, Halloween is all about the rules. Say trick or treat. Don’t blow out your pumpkin before midnight so the demons don’t get ya. Always check your candy.

There are rules for my parents house. I give out the candy there and we go through like 30 pounds of it in a night.

Not Saying Trick or Treat? No Candy. (EDIT: If they don’t say it, I always ask them “What do you say?” Which is funny too. Sometimes they go through “Thank you” “Happy Halloween” then finally get to “Trick or Treat.” Then they do get their appropriate amount of candy.)

Saying Trick or Treat with no costume? One candy, low tier.

Trick or Treat with Costume? 2 pieces, probably some chocolate.

Trick or Treat with High Effort or Very Unique costume I haven’t seen 10 of all night? 3-4 pieces def some chocolate and a ring pop.

Within that, older siblings escorting younger? Extra piece + glow stick.

Family Costume Set? Extra piece and my mom takes a picture of them.

I scare the shit out of you when I rip the door open? Extra piece?

I scare you and you cry? Extra chocolate.

Babies? Mom deserves an extra piece.

I don’t think I’ll ever be one of those. Tho, TexasDrunk always seems to chime in when he sees me. But it has been a while.

Hi TexasDrunk, hope it was a good Halloween at the bar.

Truck bros park in the dead center of 4 spots.

You wouldn’t a you wouldn’t would you?

Turns bulb slightly in socket

I AM AN EXORCIST!

I’d buy it. Especially an outdoor pizza style oven in the style of a Minecraft furnace.

Mine will only sleep on my hip. If I roll over and he falls off? Back on other hip.

No one loves Texas more than Texans. And no one hates Texas more than Texans.

And keep Texas out of your mouth.

Sincerely,

A Texas hatin’ Texan.