My girlfriend had computer RAM in her purse. That is now why she is my wife.

Through my mental fog lies a Souls boss waiting to destroy all who attempt to enter (including me).

Me the second I read this: FUCK. THAT. 😠

The last lending library I saw had some religious discs placed inside them. Expected them to be of the usual Christian variety. Oddly enough, it was actually of some rabbi.

I was under the impression that Judaism wasn’t about proselytising. 🤷

Sounds like this brand name needs a new start.

A NEW START… Hmm…

I got it!

ANUSTART!

Awww…She looks just like you!

Years ago, a family member (who was on my mobile phone family account) was getting charged monthly for some mobile game. I would point it out every month, and they were like “Yeah…I need to cancel that…”

It took over a year for them to get around to canceling it.

Women are so cute and beautiful but I think they are talking about getting their horse in a koozie

We have a 2012 Ford Fiesta that we call “Siesta”. That car sucks a good amount. Been meaning to get rid of it for years now.

Now to stick him in the closet until winter

One star off because the doctor is the one who hit them with a Mercedes

I eat a spoonful of peanut butter on a daily basis. It’s the best.

That scene in Ghost messed me up.

I had a cat that would fetch rings from milk jugs.

100 Grand. There seems to only be one.

Wow, that looks tasty!

What brand is it?

This was my first thought lol

I hope they have their permit

When I was a small child, I put a piece of Cheerios cereal in each nostril, to “see if I could breath through the tiny holes”. They got stuck, I panicked, then fell asleep. When I woke up, they were gone. I always assumed they dissolved.