I hate nylocks. They are such a bitch to work with in my experience

I’m not a woman, but I’m always down for a good weenie roast, watch:

You’re a disappointment to your parents, and need to get your life together

Back when Disney movies were gut punches

What if I come around the corner, muttering about how things in my life suck, and a skeleton gets me, and agrees with my complaints?

Airborne seafood.

Cat just batted him around a few times in the air first, before chowing down on a leg.

Bunch of spring-loaded snakes

Non-stop nut November

That GUARD post you’re referring to was fucking amazing. My friend and I are still laughing at it

I’m doing my part!

I actually agree, but I didn’t when I was a kid

Good friend of mine for a bit of fibre stuck in there from the Q tip, it got infected and blew her ear drum…

That was a wonderful rabbit hole

I figured, but still

I can’t stand them either. I get them. I respect them. I just don’t like them. Stones are the better UK band from the 60s.

I haven’t even finished reading this and I’m saving it as pasta. The fact you put this much effort into a shitpost is amazing.

Edit: this is legitimately well written to boot. Amazing job @[email protected]

You… You ok bruh?

So it’s value is essentially zero?