Just wait till your flashlight needs to connect to wifi via an app that you download and log in via Facebook or Google and only works if gps is enabled and it also has to have access to your contacts and it gets your first born child.

I had a microwave that moved the plate side to side which worked really well for heating anything solid, but heating liquids usually resulted in a mess.

The supreme cunts can just change their ruling whenever they feel like it, so as long as it’s their boss tRump it’s fine but anyone they tRump doesn’t like they’ll just make another decision saying you can’t do that anymore.

Well if you or someone you don’t like was injured give us a call.

If you’ve been injured by a self driving truck call our office right away as you may be entitled to compensation.

He’s part manie coon here’s a better picture of him

Jiggawatt

Can’t we make crime illegal already?

Years ago a co-worker/friend thought it funny to make a thin metal outline of a gun and place this metal in a book of another co-worker headed to the airport, friends like this who needs enemies?

I was thinking of cancelling my Internet service, I only use the facebooks and sometimes emails I don’t use the Internet anymore.

-my mom.

Stupid sexy Flanders pigeons.

I wish men wearing speedos weren’t considered gay, I know how unpopular this idea is but try swimming in them just once and you’ll hate going back to those clumsy board shorts.

When you look at someone through rose colored glasses, the red flags just look like flags.

Recently bought a rowing machine, gotta say I enjoy taking my frustrations from the day and putting that energy into rowing.