Stolidus
- It sounds strong and powerful
- It’s Latin, and therefore properly awesome.
- It’s definition is: foolish, absurd, dumb, forceless, powerless
Your first it’s is correct. It is Latin.
Your second it’s should be its. The definition belongs to the word. But to be fair, I typed it correctly, and then just now had to go back and fix the autoincorrection. So that probably happened to you as well.
Staties McStatyface
El Gabacho
The Land of the Flee while you still can
Whatever the natives decide on tbh. Turtle island is popular but applies to the continent not the country
Clown Country
Serious answer: the Viking settlers named the land “Vinland” long before Columbus was even born. That name is of Germanic origin, same as the English language, and would be appropriate for settlers of Germanic origin (England, Germany, etc.)
Alternatively, a name in the Native American language would be most appropriate given that they were the original inhabitants of the land.
A name in the Native American language
There is no single native American language. There are over 200 of them, and used to be around 300-400, in 57 different families and over two dozen completely isolated languages (which might not be, but it’s hard to find out). And they’d likely be at the very least somewhat mutually culturally insensitive.
So that might be even more difficult than using English, which at least has the benefit of being popular now.
“OKLAHOMA”, but in all caps because it’s big now.
Needs at least two exclamation points on that thing; to properly imply scale. Add an extra one for each of the following territorial acquisitions: Canada and Greenland.
Coming soon, to a map near you: OKLAHOMA!!!
Listen. I know you said no wrong answers but unfortunately due to the past few decades of the American Political system, pretty much anything is now effectively accurate. Even such things as:
- The Divided States of America
- McMilitary Industrial Complex
- The Paycheck-to-Paycheck Republic
- Red vs Blue
- Gilded Ruins
- AmeriKKKa
- Walmartistan
- Gunlandia
- Yeehaw Reich
- Methlehem
- Debtlandia
- Live, Laugh, Lawsuit
Bonerland
South Canada
united states of fuck you, i got mine.
Turtle Island
Hey now, I’m feeling attacked!
To the top with you
Brawndoland
Given the religious fervor throughout its history, how about naming it after an ancient biblical region?
Transjordan?
Wait. Shit, that won’t work, even Jordan’s gone woke. Maybe something else in the region?
OH! How about Gilead!?
Except Transjordan isn’t biblical. It’s the region of Palestine that became The Kingdom of Jordan. As opposed to Cisjordan, which is the region that became Israel and the present Palestine.
But I don’t think we’re allowed to say cis anymore. /s
Except Transjordan isn’t biblical
I know, but when I Googled to confirm the name of the country in Handmaid’s Tale, I noticed the real Gilead was in Transjordan, saw a joke opportunity sitting there, and that was the smoothest I could work it in. I’m open to workshopping it.
Trade names with the Gulf and become the United States of Mexico.
A not-insignificant amount of the USA was Mexico, at one time.
There’s nothing united about it, other than maybe hatred towards minorities
New New Mexico and Old New Mexico
